testing

as seen in lost anarchy magazine

Sun, 19 May 2013 12:46:12 -0700

as seen in lost anarchy magazine: necronicki: Ghost B.C., or Ghost rather, is church carnival music...

lulubonanza: Drawn By Kevin Barber Blog

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 14:30:35 -0700

lulubonanza:

Drawn By
Kevin Barber

Blog

Captain Anarchy's Hollywood Memoirs

Wed, 13 Mar 2013 22:10:35 -0700

Captain Anarchy's Hollywood Memoirs: RIPPED FROM THE PAGES OF LOST ANARCHY MAGAZINE

Nostalgia Critic: Nostalgia Critic: Let’s Play...

Sun, 27 Jan 2013 16:09:11 -0800

Nostalgia Critic: Nostalgia Critic: Let’s Play Bart’s Nightmare

ATTENTION PARENTS W/ TEENAGE KIDS…please, for the love of...

Mon, 10 Dec 2012 12:56:00 -0800

ATTENTION PARENTS W/ TEENAGE KIDS…please, for the love of god…BEAT YOUR KIDS…the boys are the girls and the girls are the boys…IF YOU DON’T DO THIS WE WILL BECOME AN AMAZONIAN SOCIETY (and later an incectian society where the males are used for reproduction and then eaten by the queen)…and let’s face it…BROADS GENERALLY MAKE THE WORST LEADERS…why…THEY THINK W/ EMOTION RATHER THAN LOGIC (alright, men think w/ their dicks)…i know i sound like a male shuvanist pig, but i look at it like this…MOJO IS ALWAYS RIGHT AND KNOWS IS OWN KIND (self absorbed, emotional little bitches who were over medicated as a child) WHEN HE SEES THEM…i was the prototype of this generation, goddamnit…BRING IT ON, BITCHES!

what did the people who made Dredd 3D do to make them get screwed in the deal…IT’S LIKE THE STUDIOS INTENDED TO HAVE IT BOMB…it was the best movie of the year and it bombed in the theatres and now the dvd won’t be out til january…FUCKING FUKKHEDZ!

NOW A MESSAGE OF HATE…never trust a Vegan or Vegetarian…WHY…they’re more likely do more drugs than the average person, have the excuse that they don’t eat animals to give them the right to treat people like shit, lack the protein to give them any real brain cells that omnivores have, and are always smug…IN SHORT…shoot first and ask questions later…YOU KNOW, CUZ THEY ARE FOOD AND THAT’S IT…i have a message about a certain death metal singer of a certain band…IF YOU SLASH SOMEONE’S TIRED YOU’S A PUNK ASS BITCH…i’m not saying this outa personal reasonings, but outa pure principle…THAT’S WHAT A SPITEFUL PROM DATE WOULD DO WHEN HER DATE DITCHES HER…that and if you don’t sell enough tix at yer show and show up late…DON’T BE SURPRISED IF THE PROMOTER DENIES YOU AT THAT GIG, YOU FUCKING PEASANT…wanna fight about it…IT’S TIME TO TRASH TALK ON ACTORS WHO RUIN MOVIE FRANCHISES: Shia LaBeouf (he’s on the top of our list for obvious reasons), Emma Stone (every movie you are cast in will bomb, cuz you are cursed), that chick from The Hunger Games (you ruined X-Men: First Class), Scott Bakula (it’s not his fault, but if you make a movie franchise that is about to go under you hire this man), Danє Cook (he’s just ho

rrible), Ryan Reynolds (dane cook’s clone), Joseph Gordon-Levitt (nuff said, he ruined gijoe and batman), anyone from The Twilight Saga (literally the cast, director, producer, writer, author, fans, even the boom mic guy), Collin Farrell (it’s not his fault it’s his agent for casting him in remakes), and whoever i’m missing…FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU…please, for the love of god…STOP SUCKING YOUR AGENT’S DICK!

NOW THAT WE GOT THE RANDOM HATEMAIL OUT OF THE WAY…it’s back to business, goddamnit…AS YOU KNOW NAMM IS A MONTH AWAY…we here at Lost Anarchy Magazine are doing out NAMM issue and you will so want to be in it…IT’LL BE PASSED OUT ALL OVER THE TRADE SHOW THAT IS NAMM AS WELL AS OTHER PLACES TO PROMOTE IT…deadline is december 20th and the release date is december 31st aka New Year’s Eve…AD RATES ARE AFFORDABLE (have you seen the prices in la weekly or skinnie)…here are our ad rates:

FULL COVER/2 PAGE COLOR SPREAD $900
HALF COVER/1 PAGE COLOR $700
SMALL LOGO ON THE COVER/1 PAGE COLOR $500
SMALL LOGO ON THE COVER/HALF PAGE COLOR $300
SMALL LOGO ON THE COVER/1 PAGE B&W $200
SMALL LOGO ON THE COVER/HALF PAGE B&W $100

SINCE MOJO ISN’T GETTING ANY REAL FEEDBACK ON THE LAST FEW...

Fri, 23 Nov 2012 18:59:00 -0800

SINCE MOJO ISN’T GETTING ANY REAL FEEDBACK ON THE LAST FEW RANTS…it’s time to really push your buttons on what really gets you facebook losers all worked up…SHIT TALK ON BANDS…i know that i’m too old and too young to get anyone, but seriously Avenged Sevenfold is overrated just like the kings of the pity fuck bands Warner Drive…YOU DON’T ROCK YOU DON’T SUCK YOU ARE JUST MEDIOCRE…you dress a little better than others, don’t sound too bad or good, and because of it…EVERYONE LIKES YOU…just like Nickelback…AND…to all fans of Cattle Decapitation…BEING VEGAN IS NOT METAL…the same can be said about Demon Hunter and being a christian band…NOW BRING ON SOME HATEMAIL, YA FUCKING TROLLS…2nite on The Sunset Strip it’s the California Metalfest battle of the bands aka bands who can’t afford to pay to play the real event and so they’re whoring themselves so they can play around breakfast time 2morrow at the Key Club, the SMOG’s 6 year anniversary at the Roxy Theatre (never heard of ‘em and don’t care), Checkpoint Charlie at the Whisky A Go Go (never heard of ‘em either), and Cardiac at The Viper Room…LIKE IT REALLY FUCKING MATTERS…i’m a jaded asshole, you are all my bitches, David Jonathan DiSarro-Cardiac’s my nigga, i might stop by there if i’m on the guestlist, but the viper has been dicks to me lately and the way i look at it…BOW DOWN TO MOJO OR FUCK OFF…there, i said it…LET MOJO BACK AS A HOUSE GUEST OR GO FUCK YOURSELF…i’m the fucking phenom of the sunset strip and if you don’t recognize you’re a punk ass, gay ass, coward ass, fake ass bitch…WHAT NIGGA WHAT?

Almost Famous said it best about all these so-called rockstars: “You CANNOT make friends with the rock stars. That’s what’s important. If you’re a rock journalist - first, you will never get paid much. But you will get free records from the record company. And they’ll buy you drinks, you’ll meet girls, they’ll try to fly you places for free, offer you drugs… I know. It sounds great. But they are not your friends. These are people who want you to write sanctimonious stories about the genius of the rock stars, and they will ruin rock and roll and strangle everything we love about it. “

and yes…MOJO IS THE ENEMY..in fact i am the ultimate enemy…MOJO’S GOT STYLE, HE COULD DO YOUR JOB BETTER, AND WILL RAPE YOU IN THE BUTT…if yer my nigga then don’t worry, but if yer not…TIME TO LAYETH DOWN THE PIMPETH HAND!

ANYWAYS…i just saw the trailer for Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters and thought to myself…THEY WILL JUST GREEN LIGHT ANYTHING, WON’T THEY…it stars the guy who played Hawkeye (the most useless of the Avengers), that broad who was in Clash of the Titans, and Jean Grey from the original X-Men Movies….DUDE…haven’t you learned from the failure of Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter…WHEN’S MOJO’S BIG FUCKING BREAK…my shit is better than this, but no…YOU HAVE TO HOOK UP FUKKHEDZ…give me a budget and i could do a better job than all of you inside the box fukkhedz put together…HERE’S AN IDEA FOR A MOVIE…me, a bunch of naked broads in trechcoats and guns wearing mojo warpaint, go to all the studios and hold ‘em hostage…WHAT DO YOU THINK (this is not a threat it’s a movie pitch)..now to see if what i said earlier about The Viper Room doesn’t bite me in the ass…MOJO WAS WIRED…i had a NOS Energy Drinkwhile taking Necro Nicki to work (and that’s a far drive in the morning), helped around the house as soon as i got home, got harassed by Balboa Press Publishing, started preparations for the next issue of Lost Anarchy Magazine, stress out about getting new gear in time to do the next issue, dealing w/ trying to learn german (the version of the Adobe Photoshop and Adobe InDesign i downloaded are in fucking german) while trying to work on my art…IS ZOLL THE SAME AS EQUALS?

for weeks i have been holding back from getting...

Mon, 05 Nov 2012 15:48:00 -0800

for weeks i have been holding back from getting stupid Republican Party comments, but since 2morrow is election day and i’ll prolly make a comic out of it later…LET THE WAR BEGIN…fuck Mitt Romney…IF THE MORMON AND THE ANDROID GETS ELECTED THEN THE NATION WILL GET WORSE…yes, Barack Obama isn’t that great, but romney is worse…NOW BRING ON YOUR RIGHT WING SISTER FUCKER COMMENTS AND BUY THIS BOOK…if Mitt Romney wins im going back to Heavenly trip to hell, cuz if those peasant kings can build a whole following on how much they hate George W. Bush then romney will be even easier…AND THIS TIME WE’S DOING IT MOJO’S WAY…none of this talk on revolution and half assing your plan…WHAT NIGGA WHAT…if you vote Mitt Romney and under 30…YER A RACIST…don’t get me wrong…EVERYONE’S A LITTLE RACIST…i hate mormons, but that’s a religion and i hate the fan fiction of the bible…AND THE BIBLE IS BULLSHIT TOO…comedian Lewis Black said it best…THE REASON WHY THE HEBREWS WROTE THE OLD TESTAMENT WAS THAT THEY WERE CRAZY AND HAD TO DO IT SO THEY WOULDN’T GO CRAZY…and remember…WHEN A BROAD GETS HORNY AND VIOLENT WHEN SHE DRINKS IT’S OKAY TO SOCK HER WHEN SHE GETS VIOLENT (choking her while fucking is good too)!

This morning Necro Nicki thought i was her bitch again and i...

Mon, 22 Oct 2012 11:49:35 -0700

This morning Necro Nicki thought i was her bitch again and i realized that if you enable people w/ their bad behavior bad karma will follow…A LESSON TO ALL Y’ALL TO GET YOUR SPINE BACK…you see, this year is a valid lesson of broads getting you into trouble…ONE GOT MOJO’S VIP STATUS VETOED FROM A VENUE (the new general manager from the viper room took my house guest powers taken away, cuz of the fabulous miss wendy) AND THE OTHER CONTINUES TO DO STUPID DECISIONS AND CONTINUES TO DRAG MOJO INTO IT (necro nicki)…this morning i stood up for myself to one of em…AND SINCE MOJO GOT MONEY OUT OF BOTH OF THEM IT’S TIME TO MOVE ON…still, i wish wendy would still put out, cuz she was a whole lotta fun, but whatever…THE PRICE OF HAVING INTEGRITY…i wish i was stupid like nicki so i can get whatever i want…THIS IS THE DOWNSIDE OF OUR MODERN SOCIETY…the dumber you are the more you get the smarter you are the harder you have to either work…THAT OR THERE’S ALWAYS PLAN B!

TIME TO STIR UP SOME SHIT…i’m sorry, but screen...

Thu, 11 Oct 2012 22:01:07 -0700

TIME TO STIR UP SOME SHIT…i’m sorry, but screen printing shirts is not a clothing line it’s a t-shirt company just like dj’s are not musicians…MOJO CAN SPOT PHONIES, CUZ HE’S AS MUCH OF A PHONEY IN THE ART WORLD…at least i can admit it…DETHISTO (the evil voice in everyone’s head) HAS RETURNED TO RIG ELECTIONS AND MAKE SURE 2012 HAPPENS (along w/ his entourage)…and yes he knows who the real Paul Ryan VP’s true identity…HE’S NOT JUST A PUPPET…he was either created by skynet or by Walt Disney Imagineering…EITHER WAY HE’S NOT A REAL PERSON…isn’t it funny that the right wing is pro-death penalty and anti-abortion and the left wing is anti-death penalty and pro-abortion…MOJO IS PRO-DEATH…i believe is ridding the world of stupid people (both born and unborn)…AND BY THE WAY…if yer a fan of Cattle Decapitation just know this…BEING VEGAN OR ANIMAL RIGHTS ACTIVIST ISN’T METAL…now bring on the hatemail, fukkhedz!

the recap

Fri, 28 Sep 2012 14:18:23 -0700

the recap

NITE IS A NITE OF METAL…it’s Club Vodka w/ special...

Thu, 27 Sep 2012 19:24:00 -0700

NITE IS A NITE OF METAL…it’s Club Vodka w/ special guests Obituary band and bunch of others…2MORROW IS UP IN THE AIR…then this saturday, september 29th is Taquila Mockingbird’s Punk Rock Museum at KGB Studios where my artwork will be displayed…AND YES…the deadline to be in the next issue of Lost Anarchy Magazine is the following monday, october 1st…AS FOR THE REST OF THAT WEEK…there’s the fabulous miss wendy’s birthday party @ the viper room on october 5th

who agrees w/ me that the only good Highlander film is the first...

Tue, 11 Sep 2012 15:28:18 -0700

who agrees w/ me that the only good Highlander film is the first one…IT WAS A CLASSIC…Highlander 2 brought it a sci-fi theme to it and brought back Sean Connery randomly, Highlander 3: The Final Dimension was basically a remake of the first film, cuz it was an apology to the fans for making part 2, Highlander: Endgame was telling the fans that Christopher Lambert was done w/ the films, and the last one was even more crap…IN SHORT, THEY SHOULD’VE JUST DONE THE FIRST ONE AND BEEN DONE W/ IT AND HAVE NEVER HAVE DONE THE TV SERIES

Last night was bullshit…WHAT HAPPENED YOU ASK…well,...

Sat, 08 Sep 2012 12:54:00 -0700

Last night was bullshit…WHAT HAPPENED YOU ASK…well, let’s just say i’m over drama queens who choose losers over winners, cuz last night a certain female lead singer of a certain death metal band played their first show at a certain world famous night club and in the process lied, brought a new fuck buddy who was below me, promised to talk about it, but instead hid behind her friends and said that I was stalking her…TYPICAL FUCKERTON POSER, NO…did i mention that she gave me a ticket for her show and was asked to print out her set list (which i did) and yet i’m the stalker…SHE IS ALSO THE SAME PERSON WHO GOT A DUI THE LAST TIME SHE SCREWED MOJO OVER LIKE THIS (did i mention that i rescued her ass from jail the next day out of bad judgement and took her to get her car out of impound and yet im the fucking stalker)…let that be a lesson for yas…THIS GENERATION ARE A BUNCH OF SELFISH FUKKHEDZ WHO ARE GONNA FUCK UP THIS COUNTRY…that and i was so D.E.N.N.I.S.ed by this broad…SHE DEFINED HER VALUE, ENGAGED PHYSICALLY, NURTURED DEPENDENCE, NEGLECTED EMOTIONALLY, INSPIRED HOPE, AND SEPARATED ENTIRELY…last time i had a situation like this was last year when i dated some broad for a week and she dumped me for some fat, shit eating, poser ass photographer w/ no real connections (and had the balls to call me low class when she lived in a trailer park in compton, fucking compton)…AND YES, SHE WAS FROM THIS NEW SELFISH GENERATION OF FUKKHEDZ…the ones who don’t know what they really want, could do something great, and end up hooking up w/ some loser over a winner…MOJO, STOP YOUR BITCHING…she needs to grow the fuck up and i need to just grow a pair, go for broads more my age who are not barflies on the sunset strip!

ONCE AGAIN…proving that the History Channel works for...

Fri, 07 Sep 2012 13:36:33 -0700

ONCE AGAIN…proving that the History Channel works for the Republican National Committee…IT’S BEEN ALL 2012 WORLD IS GONNA END DURING THE DNC 2012…i know that you right wing sister fuckers wanna talk shit on the left, but come on…IT’S SO OBVIOUS THAT THE HISTORY CHANNEL WORKS FOR YOU…that and fuck the history channel…THAT SOUTH PARK POINTED IT OUT THE BEST!

BACK TO THE FREDDY KRUEGER DEBATE FROM THE OTHER DAY…this...

Fri, 07 Sep 2012 12:26:00 -0700

BACK TO THE FREDDY KRUEGER DEBATE FROM THE OTHER DAY…this is what Robert Englund said about Jackie Earle Haley: Jackie is not big, and I think that Jackie’s size is gonna really work. One of the metaphors I’ve used for Freddy is a little rabid dog that just bites your ankle and holds on. And I think Jackie brings that, with his own physicality, to the role, without ever having to work it a little bit…THAT AND YOU KNOW WHAT GOT HIM THE ROLE…it was his role as Rorschach - Watchmen…MOJO IS NOT TROLLING HE IS RESEARCHING…in lamens terms…ROBERT ENGLUND ADMITS THAT HALEY DID A BETTER JOB THAN HIM…that and they’s 2 peas in a pod…BOTH CALIFORNIA NATIVES (los angeles county to be exact), BOTH WERE CHILD ACTORS…it was like it was destiny…AND TO TOP IT OFF…haley just gives off the creepy vibe naturally while englund gives off the rob halford sounding like green jello…WHATEVER…the dorks from The Horror Drunx will just debate me, cuz they’s purists…DON’T GET ME WRONG…i used to think like you and there are some movies that shouldn’t be remade…LIKE TOTAL RECALL…i did like the Rob Zombie halloween better than the original, cuz they actually show myers’ point of view where you almost feel sorry for him…THAT AND JASON VS FREDDY WAS AWESOME (prolly, cuz horror flicks are just so damn cliche)…that and face it…HORROR MOVIES ARE FOR STUPID PEOPLE…they’s not scary and it pisses me the fuck off that sci-fi and comic book nerds are unaccepted, but horror movie nerds are considered cool…DUDE, THEY’S NERDS TOO FOR FUCK SAKES…sci-fi takes more intelligence to comprehend (not to mention a bigger budget) and comicbooks are the precursor to pop, sub, and counter culture…WHAT NIGGA WHAT?

I just designed a hardcore #Dredd3D comic book cover! Take the...

Thu, 06 Sep 2012 19:04:15 -0700

I just designed a hardcore #Dredd3D comic book cover! Take the law into your own hands and create your own. Then see Dredd 3D in theaters September 21. http://www.dredd3dcomiccovercreator.com

TO THOSE WHO DIS COLLIN FARREL FOR DOING REMAKE ROLES JUST KNOW...

Wed, 05 Sep 2012 16:17:52 -0700

TO THOSE WHO DIS COLLIN FARREL FOR DOING REMAKE ROLES JUST KNOW A FEW THINGS…he dissing himself too and even though Total Recall sucked ass and is blasfamy period he did a good job in Fright Night due to him being a superfan of the original…THAT AND LET’S FACE IT…it was better than the original…YES, YOU CAN CALL MOJO A FUKKHED FOR PRAISING REMAKES, BUT COME ON!

as much as i hate Joseph Gordon-Levitt w/ a passion…COME...

Wed, 05 Sep 2012 16:05:35 -0700

as much as i hate Joseph Gordon-Levitt w/ a passion…COME ON…he ruined GI Joe: The Rise Of Cobra and The Dark Knight Rises (both movies were crap anyways, but he still adds to the ruin) i admit that Looper does look good, cuz they sure made him look like Bruce Willis, goddamnit!

i know i will get chewed out for this one, but Jackie Earle...

Wed, 05 Sep 2012 15:36:24 -0700

i know i will get chewed out for this one, but Jackie Earle Haley was a better Freddy Krueger than Robert Englund…FOR FUCK SAKES, HE JUST LOOKS CREEPIER AND CAN DO A CREEPIER VOICE…that and he did that movie right after he played Rorschach - Watchmen…SURE HE’S A HELL OF A LOT SHORTER THAN ENGLUND, BUT COME ON…i know it’s fucked up to praise remakes over originals (saying there’s a group of people who call themselves The Horror Drunx who protest premieres of remakes drunk), but seriously…SOMETIMES THE REMAKES ARE BETTER THAN THE ORIGINALS AND FACE IT…horror movies are pretty stupid…BRING ON YOUR HATEMAIL!

see if this works

Wed, 05 Sep 2012 00:57:00 -0700

see if this works